WORK.

just look.

great minds.

i love him to death. you have no idea. my brother, my muse, my artistic partner in crime.

HERE, watch him grow.

ticket for one.

i've got to figure out my career soon, i've just got to. i need to shoot these fashion editorials. i need to shoot these apple ads. i need a better blog. i need to nail and print ALL my black and white shots. i want to open up a personal photo/advertising business. i need to travel america. live in DC. live in Cali. live in Philly. then go back to NY. all before i'm 35.

then i need to take a sporadic vacation with an artistic friend at least once every 2 years. i've just got to. i'm tired of not being proactive. tired of being poor. tired of being hindered by hesitance, doubt, confusion, rules, and finances. be like Kesh. take risks. i swear, once i get my camera, it is ONLY uphill from here.

Ass Kicking is the Dance of Champions.

That's what I'm aiming for this year.



Take THAT, school year.

Ready or not, here goes nothing....

Kwesi Boatwright

Angela Boatwright and Kwesi Abbensetts.


my two inspirtations.








figure out what they do. i do it too.

~S.X.

flaws and all.

that's funny, because i have no flaws. just mental hindrances in the form of self perception.

SXphotography.

that's me.

i wish i knew this man personally.

update.

just to fill you guys in. i went to philly and found my sanity.





just a quarter of my boos that went with on the trip.



doesnt this look like a Dawson's Creek type of thing?



late night sessions.


and then, in other events, i finally see the similarity between my sister and I.



ok. thats all i have the energy for. =)



~S.X.

relocation.

if i were to find a man from philadelphia, i actually would not mind moving there. maybe.

reference point.

i just had to document my ambitions for my junior year at college.

i'm going to be SO on top of my game next year.

i will be at damn near every Hilltop budget meeting getting clips out the ass and getting practice.

i WILL get into a reporting & writing course and more than fulfill my minimum 15 story requirement. i WILL get a B in that class.

i will aim for a photo internship in DC for the fall. if not, i shall apply to an editorial internship for the fall (NPR, washington life, etc.)

i will bust my chops in yearbook and be the biggest help i can and leave outta there with at least 5 clips. make it happen.

im gonna apply to ASME and my application will be BOMB. i know my recommendation letter will be amazing because guess who will be the most aggressive contributing writer to the hilltop? guess who's the hilltop's adviser? =)

i willllll apply to a crapload of summer internships IN NEW YORK starting from september.

i will receive an A in every class. and a B in reporting and writing.

i will do that stuff, prove and prevail.

and i WILL.

#thatisFLIPPINall, i needa go to church after this because i truly believe in myself and i must print this post and hang it EVERYWHERE on my wall.

but i didnt want to.

i walked the brooklyn bridge today.

now refer to my title.

sometimes you need friends to force you to do things you reallllly THINK you don't want to do. i need that more often.

blessing #347926538: GOOD GREAT FRIENDS.

NATURALS DO IT BETTER.

just felt like sharing an original.

find me on tumblr: www.shutyourmouthopenyoureyes.tumblr.com
i shall co-exist there.

now back to the feature...

I Dream in Black and White

Alone, but not really. I’m surrounded by colors

The world around me explodes into a broken rainbow

Everyone indistinguishable from one another.

Time goes by fast when the crooked are made straight

When the foundations vanish, gone are the great.

I crumble. So do they.

Me next, they all pray.

I shut my eyes to leave the confusion

Leave the screams of a dream fulfilled, and a dream lost.

Identity found while being forfeited

I try to scream too, until my voice is hoarse.

Lay me on a beach of jet black sand

Soak up the side of me that people try to shun

Can’t put together where one life ended and another begun

Jumbled. Scattered. Alive. My mind is crowded.

Scan the sunlit prism. Isn’t this what I wanted?

We’re not together. It’s just the first goodbye.

Do you feel the same love you did last time you looked me in the eyes?

2239412.

And like that, my thoughts go up in flames

My dreams turn to ash

Reality came at me like a speeding bullet

And I woke up too fast

When you cut out all the bullshit and know you’re forced to wait

You’re mind is the only place you can color and be safe.

I hate living in black and white. I mean,

Compared to standing in the middle of a dream

In the midst of darkness, you’ll realize

It’s so much lonelier when you open your eyes.

4-18-10

Inspiration List

I feel like I'm lacking drive. I need inspiration, so I look to these:

"Brown Sugar"
Fuze the MC
Sex and the City
Wale
J.Cole
Shake
Solange Knowles
Anceztaz
BarbudaSun Photography
Jasmine Whiting Photography
Concrete Loop
Natelege
Angela Boatwright
Honey magazine

These people are not only self starters, but they have passion. They have drive. Or at least they represent it. I need for that to rub off on me.

drymouth.

why am i at a loss for words? don't worry, i'll think of something to say eventually.

#ASBNOLA2010

no bikinis.
no martinis.
no aqua blue waters.
no suntan.

well, maybe a suntan.

spent my spring break doing community service in New Orleans, and i'm home and already miss it. i can honestly say, that was the best spring break of my life man.

raking, bundling, digging, planting, writing by day were replaced with roaming, dancing, singing, drinking, and cooning by nightfall

team R.A.T.C.H.E.T. knew how to get downnnn lmao, alpha sigma beta (we joke we joke). but forreal, i've made some GREAT friends that week, and i wont forget anything that happened, nor would i trade my experiences for anything.

and i got a lil somethin to chase after ;]

pics comin soon!

i lost the battle, i couldn't fight the tears.

i cried.

yesterday i turned 20.
the day after, i cried.

i didn't cry because i was sad about getting older.
i didn't cry because i have to start acting my age.
i didn't cry because of the horrific dream a plane falling out of the sky i had on the eve of that birthday.

i cried because on that day, i realized i'd lost something i was really passionate about and couldnt even show for it.
i cried because i made a promise to myself that i would make it through but i wasn't even granted the chance to prove myself worthy.
i cried because optimism is fading and reality is setting in.
i cried because my dreams are now so many of my friends' realities.
i cried because i am happy for them.
i cried because i am envious of them.
i cried because i was prepared. i was ready. and for once, i was confident.
i cried because i think i actually found my place in the grand scheme of things, and what i thought i wanted so badly, i don't want as badly as i want this.
i cried because my friends and i had such high expectations and hopes for me, and it was snatched from me.
i cried because i made bonds, but i'll never get to the real bond.
i cried because i saw myself there, and i'm scared God might not, as people keep telling me "everything happens for a reason."
i cry because i am totally clueless as to why not.
i cried because even on the night where EVERYTHING was about me, all i could see in the back of my mind was them.
i cried because i was helpless, and the only thing left to do was cry.


so i cry.

and the sand goes..

so patiently waiting to prove myself
to show my worth
to show my drive
but time mocks me
the hourglass flirts with me
making sure i get a peek of every grain of sand as it falls


falls



falls



falls




just like my confidence.

solange is my ninja.

THIS is beauty.



When can I look like this?

Probably as soon as I buy a green dress. =).


~S.X.

If I told You, I'd have to kill you.

Still on that cloud 9, and I can't even say why.

=D

Hopefully when I look back on this, I'll remember what I'm talking about =/.

~S.X.

Electrik Red.

Prolific. Or kind of.

That's one way to describe last night/this morning.

And I should feel beneath myself. But I don't.



My boon coon chick matched perfectly with the most powerful card in the deck. Power needs power, it's a beautiful combination really.


My right hand took a vacation on a small plot of Brazilian paradise.


Then I got more earthbound than I ever imagined my little afro-clad self would ever get. Talk about getting in touch with my roots.


313. That's all that's important. Bonding is fun, but bonding is even more fun when Chicago Bears cups and free trouble available for download on an iPod.



Last night's adventure? There's certainly an App for that.

;)


*hope I don't forget the coding behind this in the future lmao*

so now what?

so Palindrome Day has passed.
so the ball has dropped.
so now i'll have to worry about writing an 09 where a 10 should be.
so i was tipsy when the new year came in.

now what?

what in the hell does that mean? renewel and reflection and shit right?

f*ckouttaheaaaa. i'm tired of reflecting for now. i had my itunes blasting and was "reflecting" to tears. it's time to brighten the hell up.

i can't stop being an emotional person, but i can stop putting myself in such psychological positions.

live a little! think Nicki! (minaj, that is)

with that being said, here are some New Years photos for your viewing pleasure =)










































ahh, friendship =)